Vulnerable

There are so many stories that can go with that thought.

The first time Rex told me he loved me...poor thing. I recoiled from our kiss, scared he didn't mean it, and even more scared that he did. A million thoughts raced through my mind, not least of which was "I don't want to get married!" ...and the first time I was able to say I loved him back, a month after we were already engaged.

A million and one times I think hard about what I want to say, scared it will be misinterpreted...and then when I do open my mouth, my fear is validated by the person who takes it the wrong way.

Expressions without words: acts of kindness that are dismissed, body language or facial expressions read the wrong way or not at all, and (of course, coming from me) expression of music by way of a dance that are belittled (which, believe it or not, may be even scarier for me than speaking, despite how much I enjoy it -- perhaps that is why I feel most vulnerable when I dance).

And last but not least, opinions that are contrary to the majority. Some opinions I share that I think are totally benign are completely taken as a threat.