Halloween 2012

Halloween used to be my favorite holiday with the kids. I enjoyed ramping for up the holidays, starting with Halloween. But each year, the excitement has somehow declined. I don’t know what it is exactly. I don’t really think they are getting too old for it.

They still love that I check out holiday-specific picture books from the library, but they’ve been more interested in the chapter books we’ve been reading. I still decorate the house with holiday décor, but all the pictures keep falling off the wall. (Like everything else, they don’t make masking tape like they used to.) I bought a pumpkin to carve which we will be doing on Monday (or rather I will be doing on Monday since everyone else hates the feel of slimy pumpkin guts).

Maybe it’s because it seems like such a hassle to me to figure out costumes. But James made it easy on me by wanting to be a phantom for the 3rd time – he just wanted to add a scythe.

James as a Phantom (again)

Isaac as Spiderman

And Isaac too was easy to talk into recycling the Spiderman costume James used when he was that age. And since they are all into DC comics, specifically Batman, Megan didn’t mind changing her request from the $30 Pink Power Ranger to the $20 Pink Bat Girl costume.

Megan as Bat Girl

With the exception of the Phantom, I figured we could go with a whole Super Hero theme. I tried on a bunch of costumes at several stores because I didn’t want to dedicate the time to making one, but I was completely frustrated by the fact that a woman can’t find a modest costume, especially not if she wanted to be a super hero. I figured Super Girl was the most modest, but even those were risqué. But since I already owned a red skirt, I figured it wouldn’t be too hard to come up with the rest of the costume. It took me about 5 stores before I found a blue shirt. Then I went to Joann’s (twice) to buy fabric for the cape, belt, and emblem and spent another couple hours assembling it all. See, I didn’t want to spend that much time on a costume, but at least it ended up way cheaper than buying one.

Then there was the dilemma of a costume for Rex. Men’s costumes are all long-sleeve and hot, and he is already always hot. (I think it’s ironic that there’s never enough fabric for the women’s costumes and way too much for the men’s.) Not to mention they all cost a minimum of $30. So I suggested he be the bad guy. He already had the leather vest and bandana. So he went and bought the tattoo-sleeves and spike collar to go with it.

 

Julie as Super Girl, Rex as The Bad Guy (picture courtesy of Megan)

Maybe the lack of excitement is all in MY attitude. I have come to dread the church trunk-or-treat. I know, I shouldn’t admit that, but I do. Every year, it is tradition to combine the chili cook-off with the trunk-or-treat. That means the kids are running around the whole church unsupervised while the adults eat food that kids hate (which is why we feed them dinner at home beforehand). If the kids aren’t entertaining themselves by creating chaos, they are whining and begging for the trunk-or-treat to start. Everything always gets started half an hour late, so we sit there for ever, waiting for people to show up with pot-luck food, starving because it is an hour past when we normally eat. In year’s past, the activity would end past our kids’ bedtimes because we put the kids to bed earlier than most people. Fortunately, our kids are older and have a later bedtime now so that isn’t an issue anymore. But the chaos does not jive well with my control issues.

And usually, someone ends up having a meltdown, typically the one with Asperger’s. (Go figure.) This year was no exception. James had been wanting a scythe to go with the costume for 6 months, as the kids frequently play in their dress-up clothes all year. But he had to wait till Halloween when it would actually be in the store. He loved that scythe since we got it several weeks ago. At the activity, with all the boys running around whacking each other with plastic weapons, James got in a fight with one of them and broke the scythe into splinters. He was so distraught, we almost went home before the trunk-or-treat (since that part was delayed by 45 minutes!) and he didn’t want to get a replacement. He did end up changing his mind, but by then, it was the day of Halloween and the store shelves were practically empty.  No scythe to be found.

It's probably my fault that Halloween isn't as fun as it could be. Somehow, I just can't get into it. And, like most things, the mom sets the tone. So I'm ruining it for my kids. What can I do to change my outlook on Halloween to make it fun again?

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On Halloween night, we first went to a neighboring church's carnival where they had tons of free games and concessions.  The kids spent the whole time in the bouncy houses and inflatable obstacle course.  When it got dark, we went back home for trick or treating.  I tried to be enthusiastic, but Megan was in a mood, which spread to the rest of us.  We stuck with our own neighborhood, but, like I remembered, only about every 6th or 10th house was participating.  Fortunately, not too many houses deceived us with porch lights on when they weren't handing out candy.  That had been very frustrating in year's past.  There was one creepy street where people would sit in their dark driveways to hand out candy -- no porch light.  Even from the beginning, the kids were dragging their feet and it was like we were pushing them into going up to each door.  I could not believe their lack of excitement for collecting candy!  They even asked to go home much earlier than I had thought they would.  All I could figure was that they had worn themselves out at the carnival. However, when we got home, it turned out they had scored even better than last year.  While less than half the houses in the neighborhood participated, they must have been handing out handfuls of candy to make up for it!  What a strange Halloween.

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Rex and I dressed up for the first time since the Dread Pirate Roberts year.  I always want to dress up, but coming up with costumes is always frustrating, especially since I lack creativity.  But because we were going to a Halloween dance, we had double the reason to get dressed up.  Unfortunately, because it was a dance, any kind of costume was going to hinder my dancing, no matter how un-restrictive or un-cumbersome it was. In order for me to feel free enough to dance, I have to be comfortable in my own skin and clothes.  So, as cute as it was, and despite the fact that they were giving away prizes for the best costume, Super Girl relinquished her powers to become her human self after only an hour.   (Not that it would have won any awards anyway.)  I must say, I was supremely impressed with the modesty the other costumed dancers displayed.  The older I've gotten, the more Halloween has become an anything-goes slut contest, and I really, really, really, really appreciated going to a non-church party where people were still wearing clothes!  It gives me an overwhelming sense of respect and confidence in the association. The best part of the night, though, was that Rex danced with me -- a lot -- for the first half of the dance.