For years, people have commented on how I look too young to have children. And it seems the older I get, the younger people think I am. I know I have a voice that sounds like a kid and I've always hated that. (Fortunately, it's been a while since a telemarketer asked to talk to my mom or dad....) But I never considered that I looked like a kid! I've known several women who have kid-looking faces and balerina bodies and I can understand why they would be mistaken for teenagers, but me? I know it's not just because I'm short because people ask me if I'm the sister or babysitter when I'm sitting down too.
Was it really that long ago when it used to be rude to ask a woman her age? I don't mind people thinking I'm young, but it hurts when people think was a teen-mom. I know it's quite prevelant these days for teens to have children, but I am shocked at how acceptable that is. In fact, quite a few old ladies who have remarked about my age have said that they had their first when they were 16 or 17! It is even more shocking to hear that than it is to hear people think I did; I'd think it was viewed more scandalous and shameful when they were teenagers, so why would they be proclaiming their promiscuity to every passerby?
I get an average of one comment per day about how young I look. It is just unbelievable to people that I could be 27! I caused quite an uproar in the gossip chain at Rex's school when I came to his school's office to fetch the food stamps card from him a couple weeks ago. Rex's cooperating teacher asked him how old I was "because a lot of people are asking." They said I looked like I was still in high school.
This morning, for instance, when I took Megan and Isaac to the library, a woman (who looked like this 2-year-old's grandmother) asked if they were mine or if I was their babysitter. (This is how many conversations go....) When I told her they were mine, she looked shocked and said I didn't look old enough. I usually don't tell people my age and let them think whatever they want, but I happened to tell this person as I do occasionally what my real age was. She put her hand to her mouth in surprise and said she had thought I was 16! Now what would I be doing at the library (or the store or post office or park) in the middle of the morning if I was a sophomore or junior in high school?! Teen-mom drop-out?!
This woman expressed what Rex has tried to assure me again and again: "You'll be grateful as you get older that you look so young. It's a compliment that people think you are so young." Maybe, but I feel like people are really saying I'm a slut because they think I had my first kid when I hit puberty! Can you imagine what they must think when they find out James is mine too? If I were 16 now, that would mean I'd have had James when I was 10! Thankfully, when I have him with me, they grant me a few years and say I look 18 or 19.
Mom, is this how you used to feel? I know that you and Granny were both thought to be (and still are thought to be) a whole lot younger than you really were. Maybe I'm just carrying on the legacy of youth that runs in our genes!
3 comments:
Julie-
I've got fountain of youth genes too, but don't have children (yet) to be getting the reactions about being too young to be their mom. I know people mean well, but it IS annoying when they (being nice and give you a few years) think you're 18 or so. I'd like to think that I act a LOT more mature than an 18 year old! I'm sure you feel that way too!
As to the comments by the older ladies saying they had thier first kid when they were 16 or 17, that may be a generational thing. Maybe when they were younger it was acceptable to marry at 15 and 16. I don't think it was that long ago when that was the case (and we know it still happens a lot in some states today!)
Maybe when we're 80 and finally look like we're 30 or 40 people will be jealous, but another reason you look so young may be the fact that you don't smoke or drink--which ages people and their skin dramatically. I have a lot of LDS friends that get comments or carded (for being out past curfew--that is, if she really were 16 and not 23!) because they look so young, and I really have to chalk a lot of it up to lifestyle. Not drinking or smoking (or fake-baking) when so many around us do, they age a lot faster than we ever will!
But I commiserate with you about getting comments about being so young. Who needs Olay or anything when we've got young genes!
Memory Grmes
Jason gets that all the time as well! At scout camp the employees treat him like one of the boys (until they meet his attitude); in February he organized and ran a 300 scout overnight jamboree, and many thought it was his eagle project; when we sat in the emergency exit row on an airplane the flight attendant tried to kick him out because he didn't look the required age of 18, and only believed him when he showed his driver's license that he was 26- and married too! I could go on and on... you're not alone! And it definitely has nothing to do with height because Jason is 6'5"!
I'm sure it doesn't help you that, because most women hate to have people OVER-estimate their age, almost anyone guessing ages in our country will subtract a few to several years from their guess before admitting it. They probably shouldn't do this when being surprised by your looking young, but I imagine that many people have taken to doing this without thinking.
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