Not ready for potty training

I am so disappointed to discover Isaac is not ready for potty training. I had decided to wait until after his birthday and after Halloween and when my most pressing projects were completed to attempt to give my undivided attention to potty training.

Isaac was so excited when I bought him some Cars pull-ups. I put up the potty chart and got some Cars stickers out. But I was getting way ahead of myself. It was only a year ago that I started this with Megan (for the 3rd or 4th time). Was that so far away that I had forgotten how potty training works in stages? I forgot the most important rule: can the kid recognize the urge to go potty? Isaac cannot, I realized today.

I thought maybe third child would be a charm. I had felt like a failure with the first two, especially since James, at 4 1/2 years only achieved success when he was at school. And I'm still working on Megan (strangely she has been dry through the night for a while but can't stay dry during the day). But Isaac has not been as difficult a child as his siblings -- in any respect. So I had a little bit of hope, despite my past frustrations.

I decided to try a friend's technique that I hadn't used on the others: give the child a lot of Koolade or juice to drink to make them go potty a lot. Then have them sit on the potty and watch TV all morning. Well, Isaac didn't want to sit on the potty very long, and he, like his siblings, does not like to sit still for long to watch TV. So I just made him sit on the potty chair every 20 minutes but nothing came out. Inevitably, within 5 minutes of getting up from the chair, he'd wet.

Isaac loved the pull-ups, but I still think pull-ups are mainly a waste of money since they are exactly like diapers except more expensive and the kid can put them on by themselves. So of course he used them just like a diaper and peed and pooped in it (right after he couldn't make himself go on the potty chair). Sometimes (actually a lot of times) I wish I'd never stopped using cloth diapers, especially now that we have a yard with a clothes line.

So I got out the toddler underwear (the kind with a lot of padding in the crotch), but Isaac just peed in it too, right after getting up from the potty chair. He also does not care very much when he is soiled. Fortunately, Isaac is very verbal and understands things his siblings could not understand at his age. So when I asked him if he could feel when he needed to go potty, he understood the question and answered no. I do not believe this is something that I can teach him but he needs to figure out on his own as his body matures a little more.

I admit that my main reason for starting potty training with him is selfish -- #1. I don't want to spend the money on diapers anymore (again I wish I'd never stopped using cloth!) #2. I desperately want my kids to be more independent; I'm SO done with the baby stage! #3. I'm tired of changing diapers and carrying a diaper bag with me everywhere I go.