Never wary of strangers

One thing about James, which is characteristic of Aspergers, is that, no matter how much we try to teach him about Stranger Danger, he fears no one and will strike up a conversation with anyone he meets.

While we were picking strawberries, James got distracted and found a listening ear for everything running through his head. He chose a woman down the row from us to strike up a conversation, and by the time I came over to introduce myself to the stranger, I discovered he'd already told her all about our family, where we moved from, where we lived, what school he went to, and a myriad of other information that generally shouldn't be shared with a total stranger. Fortunately, this was a very good stranger.

The first thing she said to me when I introduced myself was "is he autistic?" Now, I'm sure if I was unaware of James' disability or if I was in denial, this question would have offended me. Indeed I was taken aback by the boldness of such a question. But mostly, I was impressed that this stranger had enough insight to see that there was more to this boy than just being quirkey. I told her, yes, he has Aspergers, and she explained that she was previously a pediatric nurse (but was currently a nanny). Still, our kid's doctor would never have picked up on the cues, and in fact argued with me about it, so I still wouldn't have expected her to understand my son because of her occupation.

The most amazing thing was that the woman listened to James. If you've spent any time with a boy like James, you would know that simply listening to him go on and on about something is not as easy as it sounds. Granted, he's not like some others who talk incessantly about license plates or baseball stats, but he can't fathom that his interests hold no interest to others. The woman was so patient with him, asking him questions and confirming things, taking an active role in the conversation. Even more impressive was that she didn't offer me any advice on how to "fix" him; he is who he is and there isn't anything "wrong" with him. If she hadn't told me her occupation, I would have guessed she was in special education or some related field. Whatever the case, I am grateful when someone can acknowledge and accept my son as a valuable person, not just some weird hassle. For me, interacting with any kid that is not my own is awkward for me, let alone a peculiar kid.

Thank you stranger, for touching my life.